On a random night, like tonight!

No doubt, I’ve been away for more than a month time, away from the blogging heaven I used to drop by, away from the habit of jotting down dots of life, away from my inner feeling, and yes all because of my hectic exam schedules that I really couldn’t find any precious moment to drop by my little space here.

Oh well, finally everything has been settled down, perhaps the toughest part is done! I thought I could be freed from mentally tortured yet I’m wrong! In fact, there are a lot out there for me to worry about. Pressure never ends there. One of the reason I’m back here, it’s obvious! *speechless* (yet lots of thing to be expressed) I used to be a verbally active one, yet speech sometimes could just do limited, words could do more of an expression, that’s why I like to write, so much since little!

On a night like this, suddenly I recalled about you. It's been ages! I’m wondering have you ever dropped by since the day you’re gone? Sometimes, it’s the experience that we went through and we learned to see from different angle and see goods in others. I felt so sorry but whatever that has been done, I couldn’t erase. I’m sorry! I’m just so sorry to you that I hope for your forgiveness, really.

God is fair enough, I hope you are living a good life now. Perhaps that is never my wish to get lost in touch with you but why would a world so small yet I couldn’t met you on a same small planet that they said? It’s kinda sad to have lost someone who can hear your soul’s talking. My bad; my lost and it’s hurt a bit.

I still feel like apologizing, to you. I’m so sorry when I’m being hurt and I understand the feeling of you being hurt too. When I’m being helpless, and I remembered I’ve left to somewhere else without looking back. When I’m being in ignorance and I remembered how I’ve ignore you in the past. Sorry, I truly understand how it hurts now. That’s my very bad. I’m asking for forgiveness! They said this is a “karma”, how true?

How many next life more to go? If I couldn’t have met you again on this life, then I’m afraid to think about next life, especially there is only have one life in Christ. I’m afraid to think more. I wish silently that my phone will ring like the custom calls! It’s a fool, isn’t it?

p.s. if you ever pass by, please do drop me some lines, everything still remain intact! God’s blessing upon you, all the time.